You Go Girl!

An old friend is going to India and it’s not as easy as it sounds. Because she’ll be visiting rural provinces, she must use “squat toilets” – basically communal holes-in-the-ground with privacy (sometimes).

Worse – toilet paper is not used in many places across India.  You are left with refillable buckets of water and your own LEFT hand (this has some religious significance which I’ve already forgotten).  After you clean yourself, I’m not sure, but I doubt if a washroom attendant gives you a clean towel.  More likely it’s the old wash and wear routine.

This squatting and washing ritual can’t be easy.  But to make it even more difficult, my friend will be dressed in modest Indian garb which includes a long top, a long skirt, and a traditional, long head scarf. How she’ll keep all of this off the floor is a serious mystery.  Underwear is not even mentioned.

After ignoring my basic advice (“Stay home!”) I will now generously give her two alternative, “outside the box” (so to speak) solutions:

The first is pictured above – it’s called the “SheWee” and costs about $12.  Presumably it comes with instructions.

http://www.shewee.com/

My second solution is ballsey-er.  It’s learning how to pee like a man – without the equipment.  It’s said that God gave the choice to Adam and Eve of having multiple orgasms or peeing standing up.  Guess who got to pick first?  Here are the instructions:

http://www.wikihow.com/Urinate-Standing-Up-as-a-Female

To me the whole thing sounds like a pisser!

One Response to “You Go Girl!”

  1. Ghost says:

    For #2, squatting in and of itself is anatomically healthier — it provides a less obstructed path for waste to exit (especially on toilets) — for both sexes, and I presume improves the leg muscles.

    As far as squatting for #1, I can’t see how it’s unhealthy for females.

    http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2012/09/20/161501413/for-best-toilet-health-squat-or-sit

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