Posts Tagged ‘patents’

US Pat.#378797t00becky3452

Wednesday, July 23rd, 2008

My friend Becky is one of the kindest and gentlest people I’ve ever met. Except in the early morning – which, for her, is about from noon until two. I used to send Tuesday and Wednesday in to awaken her but now both cats hide when I make the suggestion.

Today I had to get her up at 11:00 and it was no picnic. I called her name with gradual volume increases until one of her eyes opened as if for the first time. Then the other one opened s-l-o-w-ly – trying to work as one with its sister-orb. Then an in-unison, s-l-o-w trial-roll around the room with both eyes.

This is a very delicate, critical time. NO TALKING is allowed. A giggle will get you a glare – a throat clearing will get a sneer – and opening the blinds could get you killed.

Remember, Becky is a warm, sensitive woman who is so peace-loving, she was once beaten up by Quakers. But first thing in the morning, watch out! That’s why I was surprised when she spoke.

“Do you ever use that thing?” she said, looking at my sit-up board.

“Oh – that hurts,” I said trying to suck in my stomach.

Her eyes got big. “No – I didn’t mean it like that.” From anyone else, it would have been a jab. From Becky, it really was just an innocent question.

Silence. Slow stretch – then,

“Every time I see an exercise machine in someone’s house, it’s got clothes hanging on it. Maybe they should just make them with an extra bar for hangers. They could call it the ‘Let’s Be Honest’ bar.””

I should wake up Becky early more mornings.

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