Latreasa Goodman, 28, of Fort Pierce, Florida REALLY likes McDonald’s McNuggets.  She purchased a 10-piece meal but was told – sorry – it had just run out. Goodman demanded a refund but the counterperson told her that was not store policy and suggested an alternative.

Ms. Goodman  called Emergency 911. Say what? Right – she called 911 to tell them McD’s ran out of McNuggets – stole her money – and that was an emergency. 911 said ’Yah right, honey’ – or words to that effect – probably thinking ‘McNut Case’ – and hung up.

She called 911…. AGAIN. And AGAIN 911 hung up on her. Then it was a matter of principle – or complete lunacy – and Ms. Goodman called 911 for a THIRD TIME!

The Fort Pierce Police arrived and they weren’t in much of a mood to discuss her constitutional right to enjoy McNuggets.  They gave her a summons for “misusing an emergency communications system.”

Corporate McDonalds apologized for the incident. “We’ll be sending the customer her refund, along with an invitation to return for her original order, on us. Customer satisfaction is our top priority.”

As a corporate speechwriter for 30-years, let me translate this for you.  It says: “Listen you stupid cow – we’re not setting any “A Lifetime of McNuggets’” precedents here.  ALL you’re getting is your money back and a bag of greasy chicken parts. We hope you choke on it, bitch!”

3 Responses to “McStupid”

  1. Bill says:

    Yes, the cow was an idiot, and, personally, I would have locked her up or given her a hefty fine for calling 911 in that situation. However, if I had been in her shoes, I would have burned the friggin store down and let them call 911. Store policy, my ass. Give me my money back, bitch.

  2. Joe Belle-Isle says:

    I generally make it a rule to cost whoever ripped me off at least ten times what they cost me. McNuggets wouldn’t be worth it at 10X poot. I would be more inclined to go over to the condiment counter and start emtying it of everything I used at home, sugar, sugar substitute, Jam the drink dispenser on- or something to just make them as angry as I am.
    I knew a ex-Marine at RIT that wore a BIG sombrero. He went to a fraternity whiskey sour party for the public where tickets for whiskey sours were a quarter. He bought ten and then was told they were out, sorry ’bout that and you just made a donation.
    He jumped up and over the counter and punched the jocks face in. The whole fraternity took off after him in the light of the pole lamps along the walkway from the main Bldg to the Dorms. He ran IN to a small group of other students and quickly put his BIG sombrero on someone else and immediatly ducked and stopped and turned around walking back through the crew of running fraternity brothers-who jumped the wrong guy in the wrong crowd and beat the hell out of an innocent student while he just stood back and laughed. I liked him he was crazy. Had a pet snake he wasn’t supposed to have , or any other pets, and fed the snake the other kids pet rodents they weren’t supposed to have. White rats and guinea pigs were an endangerred species around that particular Jarhead.

  3. Joseph Belle-Isle says:

    I won’t eat in the Fast Food Places in Yulee. Why wear a hairnet when they are TRYING to get their hair in your food you stupid customer! THey don’t get paid enough to actually work and YOU show up. YES! That IS the smell of fresh mushrooms being grilled permeating the air along with the fresh cowshit they just pulled them from. I ast, “Whazzat STINK in here?” and the countergirl looked back at the smoking grill and replied, “Ahhh doan knowww!” and looked at me like I was too nosy and added, “Som fin Mussah felled onna go-rill.” I had to ask one more thing, “Don you thin mebe it cood be som a dat stuff that’s sticking to everybodies shoos back deah?” “OHH NOO!” she said, “Dat’s FOOD!”
    Nothin like using lettuce to make greens, or savin time by putting the salt and pepper and the ketchup and mustard on the grill. and just scrape the cheese out of the grese pit. That’s where all the flavor is. I worked in a McDonalds and they had a manager and a supervisor that just stood behind the cooks and made sure they didn’t steal or screw up the food. And a well run Mickey D’s has good clean food. They even grow their own cattle. These places in Yulee have managers that do what they are trained for- sit in the office and do nothing like the bosses on TV where they went to school, and count and re-count the money trying to figure out not why the money doesn’t balance-but why it adds up different every single time and they are the only ones with their hands on it and never leave the room. They passed the manager test-they are the owners nephew. That town never had any places for anyone to get ajob and now theres some fast food joints by the highway. Those little redneck girls don’t WANT to work but they didn’t want their two or three kids either and none of the boys they went out with want the kids either. I actually smelled something like catshit on the grill and waited in line just to tell them I waited in line just to tell them-IT STINKS LIKE SHIT IN HERE! Oh heck, maybe it was that full diaper that missed the trash can and no-one can find. Jake thought he saw it fly in a customers bag but it MIGHT have landed on the grill and melted.

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