I Predict Fools Gonna Lose Money, Mon

Youree Dell Harris knew she could never be a Valley Girl, so she set out to buy the whole Valley. Born in Los Angeles in 1962, Youree picked up a cheap wig, some Island clothes, a JaFakin’ accent and transformed herself into “Miss Cleo” – spokesperson for the “Psychic Network”. Her future looked great!  Thousands of her “physics” kept nitwits on the phone – predicting their futures – at an astounding $4.95 per minute.

Although she promised the first 3-minutes were free – they weren’t. I forget exactly how she linked “psychic” and reading Tarot cards but she did and stole over a $1 BILLION dollars!

In 2002, the Federal Trade Commission (the FTC) pulled the plug on her shenanigans,  demanded she cancel over $500-million dollars worth of customers’ bills and pay a $5-million dollar fine.

Today, Miss Cleo lives in Lake Worth, Florida with her millions and will still read your fortune for between $75 – $250 depending on her mood.  She has a lot of takers whom she continually takes.

The 6-foot plus proud lesbian has no apologies for her past but today practices voodoo with the same hearty laugh and outstretched palm. She gives frequently to local, Florida charities.  Her donations?  Free psychic readings!  I predict these will never be tax deductible.

If you’ve never seen a Miss Cleo commercial, baby (a pet name for callers), don’t miss this:


8 Responses to “I Predict Fools Gonna Lose Money, Mon”

  1. Bill says:

    As far as I can see it is a fairly short journey from any church to Miss Cleo. How is she any worse than any number of televangelists? About a third of American women believe in astrology; is Cleo any more idiotic than that? Why blame her? Blame the morons, that’s what I say.

  2. paolo. says:

    “How is she any worse than any number of televangelists?”

    I didn’t say she was worse – I think she was better! Without the cloak of ‘freedom of religion’, Cleo kept her late night commercials running for years despite numerous lawsuits.

  3. Luigi Fulk says:

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  4. Joseph Belle-Isle says:

    aT LEast it’s not RSCIST! Just because your stupid enough to prove your NOT a racist by voting for a racist and payinfg a fake Jamakin”it boogie with hair straightener and a wig who proves she’s not a racist by taking you you stupid honkey dogs, well unfortunately 11% of our population will never control 89% of it again without race riots. The kind that wiggers won’t like.

  5. paolo. says:

    Joe, I don’t know but I get the feeling Lake Worth, Florida is a ritzy kind of place. Am I right?

  6. Joseph Belle-Isle says:

    I think the nuthouse is there. They have a special one in St. Pete for guys like me but they actually pay you more if you go there so there is long waiting list.

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