Are You a Caffeine Junkie?

What’s the first thing a diner waitress says when she sees you?

Coffee? Right away!”

And you’d better get it ‘right away’, Sugar Lips, because you’ve got a caffeine junkie who is now hurtling through drug withdrawal and trying hard not to snatch up the butter knife and stab the annoying people seated next to him.  Withdrawal symptoms started about 26-hours after your last cup of the legal drug.

As soon as you score your fix, you tear up little packets of white powder plus containers of liquid poison, and quickly mix up the nearly boiling-brew – before pouring it over one of the most sensitive parts of your body. Ouch! It hurts so good – like the needle prick announcement of anticipated joy when a junkie pushes a needle into her vein.  Coffee is America’s Drug of Choice – BY FAR! 50-million caffeine addicts drink an average of 4-cups per day.

I don’t drink coffee but I certainly don’t care what you do.

However, I would care very much if you’re one of those flaming, “respectable” hypocrites who thinks you’re better than the millions of Americans rotting in jail cells because they loved a drug which is different than yours. Your drug is legal and inexpensive. Their drugs are illegal – making them very expensive.

Still, probably we’re all just junkies in the grand scheme of the universe – and it  doesn’t need you to judge what’s right or wrong.

2 Responses to “Are You a Caffeine Junkie?”

  1. Bill says:

    Frank, you should try coffee at least once. You won’t be addicted; I promise.

    All drugs should be legalized.

  2. Joe Belle-Isle says:

    People don’t realize that a double addiction to both caffeine-and it’s STRONG in tea or colas, Mountain Dew the worst, Mr Pibb-read the labels-and an addiction to niccotine go hand in hand. If you quit smoking and keep up drinking stimulants chances are you will be back smoking. I’ve seen a mother in a rooming house I stayed in in La. with three kids and when they started raising hell she would buy them 16oz $.15C Cokes, one after the other, all day. with, “Just you wait ’till your Daddy gets home!!” Who’d hug ’em and sit them on his lap because they were well worn out by then.

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