Archive for December, 2020

Continuing, Crashing, Covid Chaos

Thursday, December 31st, 2020

As Pathetic President Asswipe enjoys his daily golf games in the warm Florida sun, thousands of Americans are dying horrible deaths across the nation DAILY.

350,000+ dead people and their crushed families have suffered so far.

The lungs of these dead patients failed as they desperately gasped for air. The last faces they saw were those of saddened, helpless medical professionals. Their families couldn’t come anywhere near them.

President Putt-Butt could have done SO MUCH MORE for them – for US – but the links (and conning stupid trumpets) are much easier choices for him.

Fuck donald trump.

And fuck you if you still support him.


Tie Died

Wednesday, December 30th, 2020

Manhattan, 1972. Retail shopping CRUSH-week between Christmas and New Years and every New Yorker thought it was his Constitutional Right to exchange every doofus clothing item he got for Christmas – or thought he got for Christmas – or got for Christmas around 1965.


I worked in Barneys, the World’s Largest Men’s store and the cacophony of customer craziness was mind numbing. “Sir!”, “Sir!”, “Sir!”, “Pardon me, Sir!” “Sir!”, “Excuse me. May I get some service here?” “Sir!”,“Sir!”, “Sir!”,”Hey, Sir!” “Sir!”,“Sir!”,“Sir!”.

I think I can speak for the majority of the 1st Floor Sales Team when I say we hated them – hated every goddamn one of them who waved a crumbled Barney’s sales receipt at us. There were thousands of them – pushing, pleading, whining, yelling, DEMANDING!

(The 1st Floor Team had a little pool going to see which one of us would S-n-a-p! first. I was the odds-on favorite.  I was already demoted from sweaters to ties for being rude to customers.)

Working in the tie department was a nightmare! Barneys advertised that they had 100,000 different ties. I never counted them but I must have folded that many at least once a day. There were racks of ties – tables of ties – walls of ties – cases of ties – ties everywhere.

It was about 9:40 pm – 20-minutes until closing – and the crowd had gone. I was exhausted and not exactly in a chipper Barneys mood. I was just mindlessly folding ties on the counter – minding my own business – when this businessman walks over.

“Uh, Sir,” he says, “I don’t see the tie I want here.” SNN…..

I slowly and painfully looked up. “Mister, we carry over 100,000 ties. I’m sure it’s here somewhere.”

“Nope. I looked.” SNNNA….

“Well, Sir, if you looked and didn’t find it, we must not have it. I’m sorry.” And then I started refolding my pile of ties. “Would you GO AWAY,” I thought, “JUST GO AWAY!”

“Well do you have any more ties in the back?” SNNNAAAAAPPPPPPP!

The ties in the back? No – those are our really good ties. We save those for ourselves. We don’t even have to pay for them – and they’re great ties – but you can’t buy one. Sorry.”

“Are you being smart with me? I pay your salary, you know!”

“Really? Great. Can I have a raise?”

“I’d like to see your manager. NOW!”

“Oh sure, I’ll get him. He’s in the back with the good ties.”

I walked to the back of the store and kept on walking through the exit. The A-train stop was only half a block away. I never even bothered to go back for my paycheck.

Barneys, NY:

Cuomo Promo

Wednesday, December 30th, 2020

‘Just Dance’ Josh Turner

Tuesday, December 29th, 2020

Wearing A Mask …

Monday, December 28th, 2020

… to muffle his high-pitched scream and cover his face, Senator Marco Rubio (R-Fla.) had ironically elbowed his way to the front of the Covid-19 line.

Just a few days before, Marco said the virus was a “hoax” and people didn’t need to wear masks or be vaccinated.

Of course he was using both sides of his little mouth. With one side, he was babbling the bullshit above and with the other, he was French-kissing the ass of Donald Trump.


Suckers Still Send Him Money

Monday, December 28th, 2020

Hero of the battle he alone created. If you believe he’s redeemed because you’ll get a $600 check you were supposed to get anyway (before he blocked it,) you’re an idiot.


Asswipe’s Epitaph

Sunday, December 27th, 2020


Saturday, December 26th, 2020

Not My Aunts.


Friday, December 25th, 2020

Frank Paolo and his new best friend, Gondolina.


Amount Of Sympathy I’ll Have …

Thursday, December 24th, 2020

… For Future Covid Victims Who Refuse To Give Up Christmas-Gathering Traditions. You Were Warned.