Archive for September, 2020

Right-Wing Whackjob

Wednesday, September 30th, 2020

Bye, Melanie – Be Best

Wednesday, September 30th, 2020

A Sad, Petulant Child

Tuesday, September 29th, 2020

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Tuesday, September 29th, 2020

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Today Is National Coffee Day

Tuesday, September 29th, 2020
COFFEE

Are you reading this with a cup of coffee within easy reach?  JUNKIE!

What’s the first thing a diner waitress says when she sees you?

“Coffee? Right away!”

And you’d better get it ‘right away’, Sugar Lips, because you’ve got a caffeine junkie who is now hurtling through drug withdrawal and trying hard not to snatch up the butter knife and stab the annoying people seated next to him.  Withdrawal symptoms started about 26-hours after your last cup of the legal drug.

As soon as you score your fix, you tear up little packets of white powder plus containers of liquid poison, and quickly mix up the nearly boiling-brew – before pouring it over one of the most sensitive parts of your body. Ouch! It hurts so good – like the needle prick announcement of anticipated joy when a junkie pushes a needle into her vein.  Coffee is America’s Drug of Choice – BY FAR! 50-million caffeine addicts drink an average of 4-cups per day.

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I don’t drink coffee but I certainly don’t care what you do.

However, I would care very much if you’re one of those flaming, “respectable” hypocrites who thinks you’re better than the millions of Americans rotting in jail cells because they loved a drug which is different than yours. Your drug is legal and inexpensive. Their drugs are illegal – making them very expensive.

Still, probably we’re all just junkies in the grand scheme of the universe – and it doesn’t need you to judge what’s right or wrong.

Coffee Quotes:  www.google.com/

What He Calls “Fake News”…

Monday, September 28th, 2020

… Are His Own, Signed, Tax Returns!

(He also took $100,000 in deductions for his haircuts and makeup.)

Bite Me.

Saturday, September 26th, 2020

Friday, September 25th, 2020

Thanks, Comrade Asswipe

Thursday, September 24th, 2020

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Uncommon Scents

Wednesday, September 23rd, 2020

THE STRIPPER CANDLE — “It’s a candle and an alibi all in one! You don’t smell like a stripper, you just smell like a candle.”

stripper_lidon_1_grande

This is our favorite candle. After hundreds of hours of research and a lot of dollar bills we succeeded in capturing the legendary stripper scent. If you don’t know what a stripper smells like just imagine the perfume counter at your local department store times a thousand… plus some baby powder and broken dreams.

This is a perfect gift for your favorite bachelor or retired stripper who misses her pole.”

Additional candles: Bacon Candle, Beer Candle, Campfire Candle, Popcorn Candle plus many more.

$12.95 @ HOTWICKS: hotwicks.com/collections

stripper

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