Archive for June 14th, 2017

Your Family Doesn’t Get To Bury Your Body

Wednesday, June 14th, 2017

When a foreign or domestic terrorist is gunned down, his corpse should be disposed of by the government.  I don’t mean desecrating the body; just a simple cremation with ashes scattered over an unidentified part of the ocean.

Boston bomber, 2013

I know his family will suffer more without a proper funeral and burial.  But remember, the terrorist is someone who decided to murder anonymous, innocent people just because they happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. The families of his victims will suffer more forever because of his act.

A terrorist is a disgusting animal who has already brought shame and dishonor to his family name. I would not grant him one last shred of human dignity.

Of course not allowing a proper burial will punish religious fanatics more than those who believe they have a cause worth more than human life.  But if a potential terrorist thinks his act will inflict pain on his own family – or slow his own way to Nirvana – he might just consider it in a different way.

The chances aren’t great – but there’s a chance.

Vous Can Have Fries With That

Wednesday, June 14th, 2017

Mon Dieu!  France has a dirty little culinary secret: they eat more McDonalds hamburgers than anyone else after the United States. There are 1228 McDonalds (which they call “McDo’s”) in France which is generally recognized as the premiere cuisine capitol of the Western World.

A few years ago, McDonalds France launched McBaguette – the French version of a double Big Mac.  The sandwich has two all-beef patties, lettuce leaves (not like the chopped-up shit we get here,) real Swiss cheese, and thick French mustard on an oven-cooked, crispy crust baguette.  The McBaguette costs 4.50 euros or about $6-US.

The French seem to love it!


McBaguttes look delicious! But of course they all do in advertising.  I should know – my first real job after school was working for a large ad agency which had the regional  McDonalds account.  I was actually Ronald McDonald’s manager – but I don’t brag about it often.  See “Nobody Sees Ronald Pee”

If You’re In An Accident, You’re Toast

Wednesday, June 14th, 2017

I saw my first “Toaster” car today. I don’t know if it was a Kia or a Scion – but I saw it from the side, it was all white, and it really looked like a toaster gliding down the street.  I almost expected a big electrical cord trailing along behind it.  It was uuugly!

Remember when you were a kid and drew a car?  You probably just drew a box and put two wheels under it, right?  Well someone stole your design and actually produced it.  My friend said they’ve been around for years and was surprised I hadn’t seen one before.  If I had, I would have remembered.

OK, every car doesn’t have to look like a Ferrari – but c’mon!  A more  eye-pleasing design and a few elegant curves wouldn’t kill the damn thing.  Auto pollution isn’t necessarily limited to what we breathe – sometimes it includes what we see.

Toaster cars: