Archive for May 4th, 2017

Is Jesus On Your Floor?

Thursday, May 4th, 2017

“Our Values Are Just Your Style”

Every time I see a commercial for this store, I want to throw up on the floor.  The business is so successful in my city, it’s opened up a second location.

Pope Soap On A Rope:  https://www.google.com/

In 1963, The Laws Of Physics Paused

Thursday, May 4th, 2017

This woman is demonstrating a basic law of physics. When one object (a melon) hits another object (a head) with force, the second object moves in the same direction as the first.

This scientific principle was suspended only once in the history of the universe!  The Warren Commission concluded that John Kennedy was shot in the BACK of the head which would normally force his head forward.  But as the Zapruder film clearly shows, Kennedy’s head exploded BACKWARDS.  After that shot, the natural laws of physics resumed.

The Warren Commission LIED: https://www.google.com/

Drowning In The Gene Pool

Thursday, May 4th, 2017

sperm-and-egg-300x185

GET BACK YOU LITTLE BASTARDS!

sperm-attack

I will spare you the unhappy details but yesterday I was kind of forced into a conversation with a few of the guys from my building. This all-male talk fest was rolling and the subject of children came up.

Right away I could tell this just wasn’t going to be my lucky day. I mean I really don’t mind kids – if they’re somebody else’s’ – and live somewhere else – and I’m not there. But I’m proud of the fact that I was one of the first men in my county to have a vasectomy before having children – over 30-years ago. Of course this conversation was not about NOT having children – it was all about the DUTY of having them. Uh-oh.

The least evolved of the group spoke loudest; it seems he has a “need to breed”.

“I gotta have a son to carry on my Family Line.”

Now the only “line” with which I would associate this guy and his family is the line at the Department of Social Services where he would need help filling out the application. If all of this guys’ offspring mutated into plants and vegetables, our gene pool would be a nicer place in which to swim. Of course I didn’t say all this – but I thought it.

Does it hurt to have a vasectomy?   https://www.google.com/

DON’T Donate To Churches!

Thursday, May 4th, 2017

masthead

READ MORE: https://www.washingtonpost.com/

CHURCHES: You want to support candidates and have religious lobbyists?  Fine. PAY TAXES – just like any other political-pressure group.