Archive for December 27th, 2015

More US Troops To The Mideast By A Draft?

Sunday, December 27th, 2015

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How many US ground troops are there now?  https://www.google.com/

In the future, to continue the “perpetual Mideast war,” it will be necessary to draft US young people to fight.  I will be happy to counsel them on how to avoid it. 

CAREFUL, don

Sunday, December 27th, 2015

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Washington (CNN)—Donald Trump on Saturday night slammed Hillary Clinton by citing her husband’s history of marital infidelity and alleged sexual misconduct, escalating the increasingly personal feud between the GOP front-runner and the leading Democratic presidential candidate.

“Hillary Clinton has announced that she is letting her husband out to campaign but HE’S DEMONSTRATED A PENCHANT FOR SEXISM, so inappropriate!” Trump tweeted.

Spousal Sexism?  What about:

mel

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Melania Trump’s adult photo career: https://www.google.com/

PLEASE SHARE THIS WITH ANYONE WHO HATES POLITICAL HYPOCRISY

You Fill In The Title

Sunday, December 27th, 2015

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Erotic GIFs:  https://www.google.com/

Win A Ted Cruz Shotgun!

Sunday, December 27th, 2015

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Win a Ted Cruz Shotgun: https://www.tedcruz.org/l/gun-raffle/

Ted Cruz

I Predict Fool’s Gonna Lose Money, Mon

Sunday, December 27th, 2015

Youree Dell Harris knew she could never be a Valley Girl, so she set out to buy the whole Valley. Born in Los Angeles in 1962, Youree picked up a cheap wig, some Island clothes, a JaFakin’ accent and transformed herself into “Miss Cleo” – spokesperson for the “Psychic Network.” Her future looked great!  Thousands of her “physics” kept nitwits on the phone – predicting their futures – at an astounding $4.95 per minute.

Although she promised the first 3-minutes were free – they weren’t. I forget exactly how she linked “psychic” and reading Tarot cards but she did and stole over a $1 BILLION dollars!

In 2002, the Federal Trade Commission (the FTC) pulled the plug on her shenanigans,  demanded she cancel over $500-million dollars worth of customers’ bills and pay a $5-million dollar fine.

Today, Miss Cleo lives in Lake Worth, Florida with her millions and will still read your fortune for between $75 – $250 depending on her mood.  She has a lot of takers whom she continually takes.

The 6-foot plus proud lesbian has no apologies for her past but today practices voodoo with the same hearty laugh and outstretched palm. She gives frequently to local, Florida charities.  Her donations?  Free psychic readings!  I predict these will never be tax deductible.

If you’ve never seen a Miss Cleo commercial, baby (a pet name for callers), don’t miss this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWyHiV3l3MA

Tie Died

Sunday, December 27th, 2015

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Manhattan, 1972. Retail shopping CRUSH-week between Christmas and New Years and every New Yorker thought it was his Constitutional Right to exchange every doofus clothing item he got for Christmas – or thought he got for Christmas – or got for Christmas around 1965.

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I worked in Barneys, the World’s Largest Mens’ store and the cacophony of customer craziness was mind numbing. “Sir!”, “Sir!”, “Sir!”, “Pardon me, Sir!” “Sir!”, “Excuse me. May I get some service here?” “Sir!”,“Sir!”, “Sir!”,”Hey, Sir!” “Sir!”,“Sir!”,“Sir!”.

I think I can speak for the majority of the 1st Floor Sales Team when I say we hated them – hated every goddamn one of them who waved a crumbled Barney’s sales receipt at us. There were thousands of them – pushing, pleading, whining, yelling, DEMANDING!

(The 1st Floor Team had a little pool going to see which one of us would S-n-a-p! first. I was the odds-on favorite.  I was already demoted from sweaters to ties for being rude to customers.)

Working in the tie department was a nightmare! Barneys advertised that they had 100,000 different ties. I never counted them but I must have folded that many at least once a day. There were racks of ties – tables of ties – walls of ties – cases of ties – ties everywhere.

It was about 9:40 pm – 20-minutes until closing – and the crowd had gone. I was exhausted and not exactly in a chipper Barneys mood. I was just mindlessly folding ties on the counter – minding my own business – when this businessman walks over.

“Uh, Sir,” he says, “I don’t see the tie I want here.” SNN…..

I slowly and painfully looked up. “Mister, we carry over 100,000 ties. I’m sure it’s here somewhere.”

“Nope. I looked.” SNNNA….

“Well, Sir, if you looked and didn’t find it, we must not have it. I’m sorry.” And then I started refolding my pile of ties. “Would you GO AWAY,” I thought, “JUST GO AWAY!”

“Well do you have any more ties in the back?” SNNNAAAAAPPPPPPP!

The ties in the back? No – those are our really good ties. We save those for ourselves. We don’t even have to pay for them – and they’re great ties – but you can’t buy one. Sorry.”

“Are you being smart with me? I pay your salary, you know!”

“Really? Great. Can I have a raise?”

“I’d like to see your manager. NOW!”

“Oh sure, I’ll get him. He’s in the back with the good ties.”

I walked to the back of the store and kept on walking through the exit. The A-train stop was only half a block away. I never even bothered to go back for my paycheck.

Barneys, NY:  http://www.barneys.com/