Archive for March 21st, 2015

“Ask Me About My Other Prices”

Saturday, March 21st, 2015



‘My Cousin Vinny’ (1992) Trailer

Saturday, March 21st, 2015

REAL Nuts Give Conspiracy Nuts A Bad Name

Saturday, March 21st, 2015

Most thinking Americans know there was a conspiracy to assassinate John Kennedy.  But one continuing charge is that we’re “nuts.”  The problem is there ARE some nuts in our ranks and they’ve put out some bizarre assassination theories.  The nut who put this clip together must have been one of the first to crack.  Whew!


Saturday, March 21st, 2015



The LifeAfterDeath Library

Saturday, March 21st, 2015


A lot of people have hopes for what will happen after they die.   Some hope to meet God.  Some dream of meeting their loved ones. Others will push into the ‘All The Shrimp You Can Eat – Forever’ booth.  Some might crowd the ‘Sleep With Rihanna Pavilion’ (mostly men). Others would collect around the ‘Information Booths’ – “Hey! If this is Heaven, where are the casinos?”

Me? I’d rush to the LifeAfterDeath Library where you could get all the answers to the questions you had on Earth. You’d just put your hands on an orb and lasers would shoot out the images and answers.

First image: Lee Harvey Oswald saying, “Of course I didn’t shoot him! I really WAS a patsy, Paolo.” (I KNEW it!)

Miss Hartman from the second grade: “OK, you little bastard; I DID say, “I don’t like wops.”

Hey – there’s Kathy Maloney! “OF COURSE I wanted to, Dumbass. You were stupid! I just didn’t want you to think I was easy.”

Wait…. my big silver ring. There it is – under the desk! Look….uhhh, who’s hand is that? JENNIFER! She’s slipping it into her  jeans pocket…………

I’ll bet I would walk out of the LifeAfterDeath Library with a vacant gaze – just overwhelmed. The kind Librarian would point out the ‘Mens Brainwashing Restroom’ nodding her head with understanding.

It probably really wouldn’t be heaven if you knew all the answers.

What’s it like to die?