Archive for November 20th, 2013

Unfortunate Choices Of Words

Wednesday, November 20th, 2013

In early 1963, Vice President Lyndon Johnson, traveled to Dallas to bolster his state’s Democratic support.  He announced that President Kennedy would come to Texas in the late fall.  When a large group of reporters pressed him about the widespread criticism of Kennedy, LBJ said, “At least wait until November before you shoot him down.”

Jack Ruby, killer of Lee Harvey Oswald, could not understand why JFK even wanted to be President. In an interview with a prison psychologist he said, “He needed that job like he needed a hole in the head.”


Friday: So Who DID Kill Kennedy?

Bob’s Bigger And Better Banger

Wednesday, November 20th, 2013

Remember Smilin’ Bob the guy who always wore a large grin because he swallowed ENZYTE every day? ENZYTE was a herbal nutritional supplement which promised “natural male enhancement” – in other words, a larger penis – money back guaranteed.  Bob smiled, his wife smiled, even the women in the neighborhood smiled because they knew – one way or another – that Bob was gifted with an unusually large penile appendage.

The other men in Bob’s neighborhood weren’t smiling – and neither were federal agents who investigated Berkeley Premium Nutraceuticals and its founders, Steve Warshack and his mother, Harriet.  Although ENZYTE is an herbal product and not regulated by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, the agents found enough evidence to get a 112-count criminal indictment for fraudulent claims, mail fraud, bank fraud, and conspiracy.

The Warshacks were found guilty and had to forfeit $500-million dollars in assets plus a 10-year jail sentence for Steve.  The forfeiture sent Berkley Nutraceuticals into bankruptcy where it was purchased by an investment firm for $2.75-million dollars.

Most of the money back guaranteed claims were dismissed because somewhere in the fine print, customers had to show visual proof (photographs, one hopes) of how the product DID NOT work. Most men just couldn’t get it up.

You can watch a typical ENZYTE commercial here.

Suck It Up, Suckers

Wednesday, November 20th, 2013

Obama will sign the new US-Afghanistan agreement next week which continues American troop involvement until at least 2024. Afghan’s Karzia won’t sign the pact until America “apologizes” for the mistakes we’ve made there in the last 12-years.

US War Deaths • Iraq 4486+ • Afghanistan 2292+