Archive for September 17th, 2013

Guess Which Girl Grew Up To Be A Stripper?

Tuesday, September 17th, 2013

“I’ll Help You, Beatrice …”

Tuesday, September 17th, 2013

Hicks Nix Pick

Tuesday, September 17th, 2013

Miss New York, Nina Davuluri, was crowned Miss America and gave an idealistic, little speech about a celebration of diversity through cultural competency. Although backward bumpkins in trailer parks probably couldn’t understand most of the words, they knew one thing alright: she wasn’t really ‘merican! The rednecks rolled over their empty beer cans and started anonymously burping on social media sites:

“She’s an A-rab!”
“She’s a Muslim.”
“Did Obama have a vote in this?”
“She doesn’t represent American values,” (this from a drooling FoxNews “personality”)

Of course Ms. Davuluri, of Indian heritage, is neither Muslim nor Arabic – just a very intelligent, beautiful, university student who wants to be a doctor.

The whole idea of “Miss America” is as dead as Bert Parks – but at least it’s trying to change with the times.  The idea of a blond, blue-eyed bubble brain is best left to “Miss Hayseed” contests at local 4-H tents in county fairs.  Sorry, gomers.