Archive for August 18th, 2013

More Nuts In The News

Sunday, August 18th, 2013

After-Ramadan Sale

Wing nuts were flying through media windows last week like dive-bombing flies at a picnic. Maybe it’s the heat.

Fox News whipped all of its right-hearted viewers into a tizzy by featuring a planned “Million Muslim March” on September 11th –  the 12th anniversary of the terrorist attacks.  The event is being organized by the American Muslim Political Action Committee (AMPAC) a fringe group that pushes anti-Semitic, “truther,” conspiracy theories about the World Trade Center attacks.

Fox gave viewers an “alert” about the event.  Since AMPAC is a nut group with fewer than a dozen members, it couldn’t get a million Muslims together if it were to give away turbans made from $100-dollar bills. But Fox likes to fan the flames of anti-Islamic paranoids for the same reason other networks feature bizarre events – to get more viewers.

Would the march held on 911 be in bad taste?  Of course it would!  Just like flag-burning and anything from the Westboro Baptist Church.  But this is America which respects free speech – even by nuts who are cracked.

You can read more about Fox and the MMM here.

Rodeos? Bullshit!

The left has its share of wingnuts too. The Missouri chapter of the NAACP demanded a federal investigation into a clown who wore an Obama mask at a rodeo last week.  It wanted the Justice Department and Secret Service to look into the matter for possible legal and legislative actions.  The clown was banned permanently from any future Missouri state fairs.

To me this is just one more case of Black attention-seekers crying “racism” and misrepresenting the vast majority of African-Americans in this country.  Maybe Spike Lee can now make a movie about clown racism in rodeos.

Read more here.

These stupid stories should dry up soon.  Congressional clowns are returning from their recess this week.

Dumb Kids With Lousy Writing

Sunday, August 18th, 2013

Every year, English teachers submit examples of their students’ WORST writing -AFTER they’ve corrected spelling, punctuation, and grammar.

1. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

2. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli, and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.

3. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

4. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

5. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

6. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

7. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

8. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

9. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.

10. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.