Archive for July 27th, 2012

Two Bears Having Oral Sex?

Friday, July 27th, 2012

Rochester, New York has commissioned some internationally-recognized artists to create huge murals to brighten up the city. This one is right across the street from my building.  I’m certainly no art critic but I think it sucks.  Oral sex seems to be the BEST interpretation of it. My neighbors say it looks like two rats fighting and isn’t good for the image of the neighborhood.

The artist says it’s two bears hibernating.  Right. I think he should add a soundtrack.

Lindsay Lohan Is Probably Out

Friday, July 27th, 2012

The internet is crackling over who will light the Olympic flame to begin the 2012 games in London tonight. Traditionally a former Olympian from the host country gets the “honour” but that certainly narrows the field for Britain. At any rate I still think England will surprise the world!

Tradition is big at the Olympics but we’ve had quite enough of it from the Queen’s Silver Jubilee.  Anyway, Royals don’t do this sort of thing so scratch William, Kate, Harry, Charles, and the Queen herself.

Muhammed Ali might have been a good choice but he already began the games in Atlanta in 1996.

Harry Potter?  Blecccch……Boy George?  What would he wear?

Paris Hilton is a champion in her sport but it’s not listed in the Olympics program.  The first Olympians performed their contests naked but that alone won’t qualify anyone.  Kristen Stewart is an up and comer but cheating is definitely frowned upon by the judges.

The Pope would have worldwide television recognition but there’s that pesky Northern Ireland thing.  Same with Nelson Mandela – universal respect but no one wants to piss off South Africa.  And anyone who’s Muslim need not even apply.

My guess?  Sir Roger Bannister,  the first man to run a mile in under four minutes.  Bannister didn’t win an Olympic medal when he ran in 1952 but he was an English athlete who stunned the world and remains a British icon at 83.