Archive for March, 2010


Wednesday, March 31st, 2010

After a Time It Adds Up to Some Real Money

Tuesday, March 30th, 2010

$1,000,000 Million
$1,000,000,000 Billion
$1,000,000,000,000 Trillion

There’s a lot of talk these days about government spending and borrowing,  and the national debt.  I can’t even imagine these numbers without a chart.  But so what if I can envision them now?  Who’s going to pay it?

Would you lend our government money?  We do better than that – we give it to them.

Just because they sound the same, doesn’t mean the numbers are even close. Think of it this way: imagine a stack of new $100 bills. A MILLION dollars would be a stack just over 3 feet high. It could fit on your desk.

A BILLION dollars would be a stack about the height of the Empire State Building.

A TRILLION dollars in hundreds? That stack would be over 270-miles tall.
Skylab was the first US space station which was launched into a 270 miles altitude orbit on May 14, 1973 as part of the Apollo program.

If a person spent $1-million a minute, it would take…….oh, who the hell cares?

Obama to Our Troops in Afghanistan:

Tuesday, March 30th, 2010

“I will never send you into harm’s way unless it’s absolutely necessary..”

I Wanna be a Model – I Wanna be a President

Monday, March 29th, 2010

Sarah Palin had a good time over the weekend and I had a good time watching her. She was in Nevada yelling, jumping around, and shaking her fist at Obama, Liberals, the Government, and the new health plan. There was not one dot of ink on her palm and I still think she’s the hottest looking woman on the national scene.

The only problem is I’ve seen her act before – lots of times.  There’s really nothing new here except she quit being Governor of Alaska, wrote a self-serving book, and dropped about 150-pounds of ugly fat: that nit who married her daughter.

When Ms. Sarah runs for President, she’ll be grilled about her lack of knowledge of international leaders and their countries and what role America should play in the world. Right now she SHOULD be taking an intensive course of visiting as many countries as she can and listening to every leader who’ll take the time to meet with her. She will NOT be a viable candidate for President until she has some international experience and education under her lipstick.

If she only continues to do what she’s doing now, I’d like to nominate her as  “America’s  Ambassador of Cheerleading” which might not be such a bad job after  all.

Whiten Up, Michael

Saturday, March 27th, 2010

One of the saddest stories I’ve seen in months came out today. It confirmed that Michael Jackson had over two dozen tubes of skin whitening cream hidden in his closet at the time of his death. The confirmation was made when previously-sealed search warrants were opened in Los Angeles.

The world already saw the grotesque, plastic surgery that resulted in the loss of his nose.  We already knew of his addiction to the pain-killing drugs that eventually killed him. And now we learn the man hated the color of his own skin. How much do you have to hate yourself to disgustingly disfigure the face with which you were born and try to change your skin color?

Many people reading this will say, “Oh, too bad. The guy was a child molester.  He got what he deserved.”

Maybe.  But it still makes me sad that the world’s most talented and loved pop legend, hated himself.

America is in a Nasty Mood

Friday, March 26th, 2010

Bitchbitchbitchbitch……………….I want to return to the days of Dorothy Parker:

I like to have a martini, two at the very most. After three I’m under the table, after four I’m under my host.

Take Henny Youngman . . . Please.

Thursday, March 25th, 2010

“She’s been married so many times she has rice marks on her face.”

‘At the airport, I told the ticket lady, “Send one of my bags to New York and one to Los Angeles” She said, “We can’t do that!” I said, “Why?  You did it last week!”

“I played a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him.”

“The more I think of you, the less I think of you.”

“I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.”

“King of the Wild Frontier”

Wednesday, March 24th, 2010

Fess Parker died last week at 85.  He was best known as Davy Crockett in a Disney television mini-series that debuted in 1955.  In that film production, Crockett was portrayed as a frontiersman, a legislator, and the hero in the Battle for the Alamo.  There was even a smidgen of historical truth in the Hollywood glamorization of this great Western legend.

Disney Studios liked Parker for a different reason.  Since he was a superstar to American children on television and in the movies, Parker was a merchandising gold mine.  Disney licensed over 1000 Davy products – the most famous of which became the “coonskin cap” pictured above along with the rest of the Davy Crockett outfit.

Little is known about the attractive young man modeling the Crockett fashions.  A persistent rumor is that for the rest of his life, he was locked away in an obscure asylum for the criminally insane.  Some say his craziness began when he could not remember the difference between Davy Crockett and Danial Boone.

Guaranteed Earworm Free:

Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010

Margaret Explosion is a group that’s been called “one of the most exciting bands in Rochester” by a music critic for our largest newspaper.  That’s saying something for a town that’s filled with numerous bands and the Eastman School of Music.

The group plays every Wednesday night at the Little Cafe on East Avenue starting at about 7:00 pm.  At the door, say “Franco sent me” and there won’t be a cover charge – really!

Their newest album (pictured above) could be misleading because Margaret Explosion’s music is layed back, classy, creative jazz – or something.  It’s hard to describe – so here’s a link for their Free Download page of live recordings:

There was a rumor Margaret Explosion was asked to play at one of Obama’s Inaugural Balls but they politely turned down the invitation.

FLEET – Shove This Guy!

Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010

Meet ENEMAN- Fleet Enema’s spokes character. Yes, puzzled observers, it’s a man dressed up like an enema container, with feet. Although he’s not seen on TV (thankfully) he does make appearances at store openings, sporting events, and (possibly) alternative sex meetings.

Who’s the distinguished actor inside the costume? Fleet won’t say – butt one suspects it is not Dustin Hoffman.