Archive for April 20th, 2008

Damn Women Drivers!

Sunday, April 20th, 2008


(Moscow) — Russian officials announced today that space capsule, Soyuz TMA-11, made a “rough” landing in Kazakhstan, 260 miles from its planned touchdown point. It took search helicopters 25 minutes to locate the damaged craft as Russian civilians in cars raced after the fast-moving parachute carrying the capsule.

A Mission Control spokesman said the condition of the the three astronauts was satisfactory despite the fact they were subjected to extreme G-forces upon reentry. The crew members included two women – a South Korean and an American – and one Russian male flight engineer. All three are expected to recover.

Endearing himself to feminists all over the world, Russian Space Agency chief, Anatoly Perminov, told reporters of an old naval superstition that having women aboard a ship was bad luck. He continued,

“In the future, we will make sure the number of women will not surpass the number of men. When a majority of the crew is female, certain kinds of unsanctioned behavior or something else occurs” He did not elaborate.

Mr. Perminov failed to mention that the last two out of three Soyuz spacecraft landings were botched in a similar manner – even though all the cosmonauts were men.